Tom Cruise said:
"I'm gonna eat the placenta. I thought that would be good. Very nutritious. I'm gonna eat the cord and the placenta right there."

When his baby is born. Seriously, who does that, who eats kiddie juices? Apart from Gary Glitter. Man, Tom Cruise is a sicko.

Shame he was joking.


It would have made real interesting, up to date news to publish that on my blog. But oh no, he was just "kidding". Unless he was using a joke to conceal his real intentions so that when it came to it he could say "I told you I all would".

But we're detracting from the real news that everyone is so interested in, Katie Holmes finally gave birth. Jeez, that bitch was pregnant for like, 9 months or something. Talk about dragging it out. Publicity, I bet. They named the baby "Suri" which is supposed to mean both "Red Rose" and "Princess". Poor kid. Not only does she have crazy parents, she's called Suri. That's Irus backwards, and if you jumble it up a bit and duplicate a few letters, you get Sirius. Coincidence? I think not. Sirius is a massive star, which Scientologists believe they came from (probably).

Maybe their kid looks like this.

Or this.

Either is probable.


Wait a minute...

Like hell that's the real news, the REAL news is that my blog was ripped off because Tom Cruise was "just kidding". Seriously, this should make prime time national.